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The Untapped Leadership Pool

By Bobbie Reed

(See also: How To Retain Single Adults in Leadership Positions)

John, the church janitor, has a special relationship with the young people who use the church gymnasium. Often one of the boys asks for advice or help with a problem. John is a leader, though his job is not typically classified as a leadership position.

Any member of your congregation may be a leader, because leadership is a personal skill that individuals bring to their jobs. Leadership is influencing people in a specific direction. Spiritual leadership involves influencing followers by the right means toward right goals.¹ The skills necessary to be a godly leader can be learned and developed. One of a pastor’s responsibilities is to look for leadership potential in members, help them develop that potential, and then provide opportunities for those skills to be employed in the kingdom of God.

Every member of a congregation should be considered for a position of leadership. This includes single and single-again adults. Over 40 percent of the adult population of the United States is single.² Consequently, a large segment of the adult congregation in your church may be single. Are they being used in positions of leadership? If not, you may be overlooking a rich pool of resources for spiritual ministry.

WHO ARE SINGLE ADULTS?

Single adults represent all age groups: some are divorced, others widowed, and an increasing number have never been married. Some are still in college, most are employed outside of the home, and several are retired. Others are single parents, including those with full custody, shared custody, or noncustodial status.

Their available time for being a volunteer will vary from individual to individual. Each will be gifted by God for ministry. Some will have to be coaxed into leadership; others will be so eager to serve they will need to be restrained from becoming over-committed.

CAN SINGLE ADULTS SERVE AS CHURCH LEADERS?

Some people argue against giving single adults positions of leadership in the local church. They generally cite the following reasons.

First, there are myths about single adults. If the myths were true, they might disqualify single adults from consideration. (See sidebar: Myths About Single Adults.) Since these myths are not true of all single adults, we must not exclude an entire group of people from leadership.

Second, is a belief that putting single adults in leadership positions would be perceived as a failure to emphasize the importance of family and family values. This belief tends to be especially strong if the person is single again through divorce. However, God forgives divorce, heals wounded hearts, and does not withdraw ministry gifts from those who are divorced. We must forgive and allow single adults opportunities to use their God-given gifts. The spiritual family includes both single and married adults. Spiritual family values are demonstrated by living in agape love one with another (John 13:34,35).

Third, a church might have a policy against having single adults in positions of authority. Such policies need to be revisited, particularly when you consider that this policy would preclude Jesus and the apostle Paul from serving if they were members of your congregation.

Fourth, opposition from church leaders or the congregation may preclude using single adults in leadership.

Fifth, a temporary waiting period may be imposed because a person’s divorce or grief over the loss of a spouse is too recent. A time of waiting for personal healing should be encouraged, but serving sometimes brings healing.

Finally, some pastors may not have realized that singles are a resource for ministry.

We must not view singleness as a waiting room for marriage. Some people will never marry. However, not being married does not relieve singles of the responsibility to answer the call of God and to use their spiritual gifts. Neither should it be a reason for us to exclude them from ministry in the church.

Often single adults excel in their careers because they can focus time, attention, and energy on their work. But single adults must be taught to alert themselves to the danger of "unproductive spiritual lives."³ If our goal is to build up individuals in leadership positions so the Holy Spirit can work through them, we will include single adults in the process.

There are many reasons to include single adults in leadership positions in the church. Single adults are members of the body of Christ and are gifted by God for service. Considering single adults as a resource gives a pastor more people from which to draw. Placing single adults in leadership positions demonstrates acceptance and validation as valuable members of the body of Christ and the local congregation.

WHO BENEFITS WHEN SINGLE ADULTS ARE RECRUITED INTO SERVICE?

First, the church benefits. When people make a commitment to serve in the local church, there is an increased commitment to faithful attendance and a reduction in the revolving-door syndrome. There is an increased sense of ownership. Also, there is a tendency for leaders to give more financially. The church’s ministry to single adults is increased because single adults usually respond to other single adults. Outreach is increased to a population that might not otherwise be targeted, because leaders tend to invite their unchurched friends. Finally, as single adults are placed in positions of leadership, there is a restoration of the body of Christ; for when one member is hurt, wounded, or excluded, the entire Body experiences the pain and alienation (1 Corinthians 12:25,26).

Second, single adults benefit. There is a personal validation of worth. They develop a new identity in the church and experience hope as they realize their purpose in the Kingdom. Their leadership experience provides opportunities for personal and spiritual growth and for making an increased personal investment in their local church. Another benefit is having the opportunity to respond in obedience to the call of God.

The personal and spiritual needs of single adults are met by being included in leadership. These needs include: being involved in the mainstream of the church, making a contribution, being recognized as having valuable gifts and abilities, making a commitment to the kingdom of God, giving back, serving God, using one’s gifts, and fellowshipping with other leaders who are committed to God. And for some, there is personal healing from past hurts as they focus on God and serve others.

James wrote that we need to act on our faith, to demonstrate our faith by our works—that includes serving God in the local church (James 2:14–20).

Paul Ford states, "Single Christians are instrumental to God’s purpose—not because they’re single, but because they are Christians…crucial players in the church."⁴

HOW TO RECRUIT SINGLE-ADULT LEADERS

The most critical step in recruiting new single-adult leaders is to pray that God will lead you to the right people for the positions that need filling, and pray that God will prepare their hearts to give a positive response to your recruitment efforts.

Here are two ways to recruit single-adult leadership. First, recruit specific individuals because of their talents, gifts, personalities, expertise, or reputation. In some cases, you may know exactly where you would like to see these individuals. In other cases, you may ask individuals where they would like to minister. You can also administer a spiritual gifts test to determine in what ways God has prepared them for ministry.

Second, recruit for a specific position. Prepare a job description with expectations and standards for the job. Without this, the single adults you recruit may not have a clear picture of what you are asking them to do.

One of your tasks is to describe how you see that person being successful in ministry. Ask questions that allow the individual to begin filling in the details of the dream/vision/picture for himself or herself. For example, ask, "If you took over this function, what would it look like?" Or, "How would you measure your success in this position?"

Some single adults will respond eagerly. Others may initially respond that they are not interested. If you encounter this response, gently probe to determine what is behind the "no." There may be fear of failure because of past failures or because of lack of experience. You can help overcome these fears by assuring the person that you will ensure success through guidance, training, assistance, and support. (See sidebar: How To Retain Single Adults in Leadership Positions.)

Some people fear making a commitment and being held accountable. You can help overcome this fear by offering the chance to make a limited commitment and/or to serve as a coleader at first.

Sometimes people feel incompetent. When you express your belief that they are competent and can be successful, often people agree to serve, based on your trust. People tend to rise to the expectations others have of them.

Often a lack of desire to become involved is simply the lack of a vision of a ministry or how a specific need could be met in the church. As pastor you can cast the vision for the person and encourage him/her to dream with you about how God could work in that particular area.

Single adults are a great resource for leadership positions in your church. A wise pastor will not overlook them.

(See also: How To Retain Single Adults in Leadership Positions)

Bobbie Reed, Ph.D., D.Min., is an author, consultant, ministry director for the Network of Single Adult Leaders, and a minister with single adults at Skyline Church, Lemon Grove, California.

ENDNOTES

1. Robert Duffet, "Developing Spiritual Leadership," in Single Adult Ministry—The Next Step, ed. Douglas Fagerstrom, (Wheaton: Victor Books, 1993), 27.

2. "State of Singles Report," SAM Journal 15 (November/December 1998), 7.

3. Harold Ivan Smith, Positively Single (Wheaton: Victor Books, 1989), 22.

4. Paul Ford, "Developing Ministry Through Spiritual Gifts," in Single Adult Ministry—The Next Step, ed. Douglas Fagerstrom, (Wheaton: Victor Books, 1993), 47.