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Preventing an Untimely Resignation

By Don E. Ross

"Don, I've got to get away from this place." I watched Bob struggle to express his feelings, his facial muscles tight with tension. He was clearly dealing with a high level of emotional pressure.

"If I could just get away for a month or so, maybe I could get some perspective on this situation and begin to put things together. There are some long-standing problems in our church that I've been trying to deal with for months, but I'm so mixed up I can't see the forest for the trees. I just don't know what to do anymore. I'm worn out. I go to bed tired and wake up tired."

"Why don't you take some vacation time?"

"I've considered that, but honestly I don't think that's the solution. I could use 2 weeks right now, sure, but what about my family this summer? They deserve some time away too. What I really need is to get into some kind of a personal-growth program that would recharge my batteries and help give me perspective."

"So what's stopping you?" I asked.

"I don't see how I can find the extra time to focus on recharging, strategic planning, vision, and personal development when I'm bombarded all day with people looking to me as their primary caregiver. Frankly, I feel like I'm being sucked dry."

A conversation like this is not unusual. When this kind of language is used, it's a signal that a resignation could be in the works. The pastor is so frustrated he feels the only way out is to leave. He thinks that once he's in a new church, he'll feel energized, focused, and have a hard time even remembering he was once out of gas emotionally.

Unfortunately, this cycle can reproduce itself again in 3 to 5 years. One pastor told me he resigned his church when he was out of energy and took a new church because he hoped he would have a year's honeymoon; he badly needed a rest. He was quite surprised and disappointed to find he had jumped from the proverbial frying pan into the fire. Fortunately, he survived and led his new church forward after an intense period of adjustment.

The basics of prayer, Bible study, and moral purity do not guarantee that a pastor won't run out of steam. As I have consulted with pastors, I have discovered that many long-term leaders are:

PERSONALLY CENTERED

They know what they're trying to accomplish. They don't often look for personal leadership cues from those around them--they are initiators rather than enablers. These leaders have a personal, internal navigational system that helps them stay on course, even in stormy weather. As I have interviewed them, I have found two consistent factors that produce this type of balance in their lives. First, most have gone through personal pain or a career crisis. They've recovered and learned from the failure or trauma. Second, there is a humility about them as well as energy. They have the ability to assess both their strengths and weaknesses accurately in a variety of situations.

CONSISTENT READERS

John Wesley believed so highly in reading that he told the young men of the Wesleyan societies, "Either read or get out of the ministry." Wesley himself had a passion for reading and devoured thousands of volumes on a wide range of subjects while riding horseback.

Long-term leaders are readers. They seem to have several books going at once, usually on different topics, secular as well as Christian. They use books to stay current, to develop sermon illustrations, and to get and keep a balanced perspective on life and the ministry. Books provide them not only respite but stimulation from a variety of sources.

MONITORS OF THEIR SOULS

These leaders know how to monitor and regulate their emotional output as well as input. They know how to recharge themselves and maintain personal boundaries so that neither they nor their families blow out or up from emotional pressure. If the soul is made up of the mind, will, and emotions, as some have suggested, long-term leaders realize their supply of soul strength is not inexhaustible. They know when to say no and are not afraid to say it. They recognize people and situations that drain their emotional energy and are careful in their dealings with them.

MISSION DRIVEN

Long-term leaders know their mission is paramount. They do not personally handle everything that reaches their desks. They focus on the mission of God and refuse to be drawn into mundane, trite, and profitless issues.

Former President Dwight D. Eisenhower said, "The urgent problems are seldom the important ones." Focused leaders are able to discern the difference between the urgent and the important in the light of their mission.

PERSEVERING

When enduring leaders hit a wall in their leadership or lose perspective, they know that a critical factor is simply deciding not to quit. Often that decision alone can bring an answer to a perplexing situation or at least an attitude change. They understand that perseverance is also a form of success.

RISK TAKERS

These leaders know that to keep moving they must take risks. There is no such thing as a place of complete security. Leaders must lead, so it follows they must also take risks. Each new vision produces a risk of some sort.

Some visions can be fulfilled in 3 to 5 years; others may take a decade or more. Long-term leaders know that at the fulfillment of a vision, a new one must take its place. This may account for some of the pastors who resign after 12 to 15 years' successful ministry. They have fulfilled the vision they had for that time frame, but instead of getting a new vision for the same place, they decide to move on. Perhaps they may have developed a sense of security and are unwilling to risk again on a new vision. General Douglas MacArthur, a man who clearly understood risk, once said, "There is no security on this earth, only opportunity."

RELEVANT

Martin Luther was a relevant leader, and he was almost killed for it. Nevertheless, he put the message of the gospel into song and word in a way that helped the common man to understand it.

Long-term leaders know the value of being relevant. They have the ability to recognize the difference between conviction and nonessentials and willingly remove the latter if they hinder the forward motion of the church. They work at staying relevant so the message will be received. You can discern their efforts in the words they use, stories they tell, and subjects they preach.

ABLE TO TAKE PERIODS OF REST

Jesus demonstrated that rest is a part of life. He often retreated for periods of reflection and recuperation. Leaders who think long term have tapped into this resource and rest several different ways. Most pastors take a regular day off. Some, with multiple services, develop preaching schedules that allow them to be out of the pulpit every 6 or 8 weeks, possibly even out of town. A few even recognize the value of a sabbatical of 2 or 3 months every 5 years and have put it in their church policies. Pastors who have taken sabbaticals say they feel like they have new churches when they return. Their congregations often feel the same way. Senior pastors would do well not to underestimate the value of rest and the perspective it gives.

Regardless of our efforts, pastors change churches--that's part of life. Each of us has questioned a move at some time. In moments of honest reflection, we entertain thoughts of what might have been if we had stayed and dreamed new dreams. Our current American pastoral paradigm illustrates that most of us dream new dreams easier in new places. It was different 200 years ago; when a pastor took a church, it was usually for life.

In his book Today's Pastors, George Barna states that the average pastor currently stays in a church about 4 years. Think about the energy and resources invested in those every-4-year moves. Consider the adjustment required of the pastor's family, the new congregation, the previous congregation, the finances involved, and the amount of time needed to bond to a new church. Rethinking a decision to resign might not be a bad idea. There are probably enough lost people to fuel a new vision.

You, as pastor, may eventually conclude it really is time to go. Perhaps the situation is such that you believe you have no other choice. Each of us must seek to know God's will and do our best to fulfill it; however, there is the possibility we could be trying to run away. If so, sooner or later we will run into ourselves again and discover that nothing has changed but our addresses.

When you stop and think about it, where you are may be the best place to stay.